I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
