So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
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when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
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If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
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