"it" just moved
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
