Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
