Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Randomize
