Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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