we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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