please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
