she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
