he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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