She said her name was "party"
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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