and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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