That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
