So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
