i think my mom watched the whole time
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
