STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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