If i come over, it means nothing
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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