Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize