So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I smell like Dick and happiness
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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