Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
