They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
