That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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