So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
