I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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