We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize