girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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