I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
