I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
This is the high leading the old right now
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
