Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
The air was thick with penises
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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