white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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