We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Randomize
