it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
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I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
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I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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