O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize