Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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