obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
