We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
