We won't sleep together?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
