dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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