I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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