there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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