I am in a vortex of obligation.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize