Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Dick very happy bro
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
