What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
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