Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize