If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
