i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
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im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Are my feet made of real feet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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