When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
