what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
