I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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