check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
