is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
